EXISTENCE

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A storm of questions was raging in her mind. She was thinking, “Where have I come and stood. What is my existence today? Who am I today. Today I am nothing. I have no one. I am someone’s wife, someone’s daughter-in-law, someone’s daughter. Somebody’s sister used to be someone’s mother. Where did they all go. Where have they all been lost? Why were they lost? Who is responsible for my loneliness. Tonight at midnight I am running like crazy on these deserted roads. There is no one to support me in this whole world. Why Karishma? What have you done? Have you really committed such a big crime. Or you got such a big punishment even before committing any crime. Why all this? Why? Your laughing and playing life was scattered like a pack of cards and on whose shoulder you could shed two tears with your head, not a single shoulder was found in this whole world. How unfortunate are you Kharisma.”

Her thoughts got a break only when the truck coming from the front suddenly applied the brakes in front of her and the sound of “charr… _ ” The driver was screaming. “Hey ma’am, do you want to die? If you are so fond of dying, then go somewhere else, why do you include me in your crime.” She got out of the car and apologized to him and also listened to his advice. “Madam, you drive the car in your senses, the fault of you people and infamous Truckers are gone.” She didn’t have an answer to his question. She left quietly. She looked around, then went somewhere to find out where she had reached. She didn’t even know that she had done it. Poona is left behind and her car is running on the way to Mumbai.

Karishma started thinking, 15 years ago, when she got married and came to her in-laws’ house in Poona, she was very happy. Her beloved husband Vineet was with her. There was a new zeal in life, there was a new love. I wanted to make everyone happy. Along with mother-in-law, there was a brother-in-law and sister-in-law in the house. It was a lovely family. The names of ‘Bhabhi’ and ‘Karisma’ used to echo in the house and Karishma was always ready to answer those voices standing on one leg. She was everyone’s sweetheart. Within a few days, she won everyone’s mind. She became the beloved ‘wife’ of husband, ‘ideal daughter-in-law’ of mother-in-law and ‘friend’ of brother-in-law and sister-in-law. She loved everyone dearly and everyone loved her dearly. Parents are happy because their daughter is happy. Theye were proud of their daughter.

She passed her B. A exam . She was married as soon as she was finalised. She wanted to study further, but the boy was found well, they married him. Thought the boy is good, the family is good, the daughter will be happy. Their thinking was right. Karishma was a modern educated girl. She was a girl of culture. She knew very well to respect everyone. Today, for 15 years, she was performing her every duty. Sister-in-law and brother-in-law got married. Two children took the lead. She became successful as a mother too. Everything was going well, but her happiness and the world got caught by someone.

Nowadays Vineet comes home late. If asked, he would have given an answer which does not seem logical. Occasionally went out for a few days. Whenever she asks, there is always an excuse ready. Talk to Karishma properly with him, several months have passed. Sometimes she would go to bed hungry waiting for him, but when he would come, when he would go, he did not keep any account of it. Initially she thought, maybe the work has increased, but now she had to find out what was the matter. She decided to ask Vineet, but he avoids, laughing all the time but cannot answer by putting his eyes in Karishma’s eyes. Karishma understood. She knew the reason behind Vineet’s indifference on her part. That reason was Pooja,. Vineet’s childhood friend.

Pooja and Vineet used to live nearby in their childhood. Studied together till class 10th. Played and jumped together. But after that Pooja left Poona and shifted to Delhi with her parents. There she completed her further studies. She became a business woman. She became a successful lady but there was an emptiness in her life, that was true love. She got married but broke up within a few years. maybe her career is the reason.
Life could not give time. Her husband got married. Her success was her hard work but her heart was empty. That heart was waiting for some true love. When she came to Poona one day in connection with business, she met Vineet. After Pooja left Poona, both were connected to each other for a few years, but gradually that process stopped. Both got busy in their respective lives. Vineet also forgot everything but suddenly one day he met Pooja. Initially this meeting was very formal. But as time passed, their love for each other started increasing. Both became partners in a business. The meetings kept on increasing and when this attachment towards each other turned into love, both of them did not know about it.

Karishma was saddened by Vineet’s behaviour. She understood everything. She had talked to Vineet many times in this regard, but it was clear from Vineet’s words that he was not going to back down. But he had told Karishma, he would not give her any trouble. All the rights of the wife will remain with her. But Karishma was an educated woman. She knew that , every thing is over and now her relationship is only for namesake. She will not force Vineet to have a relationship for name. She does not want to keep anyone tied in this false bond. She will free Vineet. She loved Vineet and her family very much and because of this love she did not want to hurt them.

Karishma knew, knew the depth of their relationship, she knew very well about the future. She was not blaming her husband for this. Rather, she considered herself responsible for this. She used to think, “Maybe there was something missing in my love which Vineet went astray. If his happiness is in Pooja, then I should not be a thorn in his life, because the knot has been fixed in our relationship and now even if we want to give a new chance to this relationship, some traces of that knot will be left behind. . No use now. We both live on suffocation, better than this, I only break this relationship so that both of them can live on their own.

Karishma started getting very nervous these days. Her sadness did not remain hidden from her mother-in-law, brother-in-law. Everyone tried his best to know the reason for her sadness, but she laughed off. One day she called her children and explained. If they have to live without mother in life, they will never be sad and whenever they remember Mama, she will come to visit them.. The son was a little older, he understood, but it took six months to convince the daughter. The children got their exams. This time she got her both children admitted in boarding school. The children were smart. Got it. She did not know how many papads had to be rolled to get the pieces of her heart away from them and to persuade the family members for it, but finally everyone agreed with her reasoning. The children went to boarding school. Now Karishma started her work.

Karishma completely changed. Now she didn’t do any work for anyone. She started treating everyone rudely. Initially, it was understood that perhaps she was upset due to the children going away, but now it has become a daily thing. She used to get confused over the smallest things. She did not even respect her mother-in-law. They also started answering by turning them back. Vineet also started quarreling in front of everyone. Everyone was surprised by her changed attitude. She also fought with the sister-in-law who had come for two days, then she went back in grief. She started creating hatred for herself in everyone’s mind. The kitty party continued all night. She used to behave rudely with her family members in front of her friends. Sometimes going to the club and sometimes returning home late at night from the party, now it has become her daily routine. When the water rose above the head, one day the mother-in-law got angry and said, “You don’t like us? Or you don’t want to be with us? Either we leave or you leave this house and go away.”

Karishma was waiting for this time only .That’s what she wanted. Everyone hate him so that no one knows the real reason for leaving her house. She could tolerate hatred for herself in the eyes of everyone, but could not tolerate what anyone say for her husband. It was not acceptable to her. And that was the reason why she created hatred for herself in the eyes of everyone.

Karishma succeeded. As soon as her Mother- in – law told to leave the home , she had to leave the house after picking up her already packed suitcase before Vineet entered the house. Karishma had left after starting her car. She didn’t even take her cell phone with her. She didn’t want to see anyone again. She had freed Vineet from this relationship. She moved away from him to make him live his life in his own way. She sacrificed her existence for her beloved husband.

Vineet asked the parents in the house about Karishma, he came to know about the whole story. He started feeling ashamed of himself. He started crying bitterly. He never dreamed that Karishma would defame herself and set her free.

Dr. Manju Rathi

MBBS.MD

LLB LLM